Life so far!

This post is primarily a self-note to remind me in future about everything that is currently going wrong with me.



Originally written on 3rd March, 2019



On the 6th of January, when I was coming home from Railway Station, I felt a little pain in my stomach. It was nothing common. The pain was exceedingly sharp but went away after a few minutes.

After coming home, I completely forget about it. There was nothing extraordinary to remember about it besides the point that if it would have lasted for a few more minutes, I might have ended up squealing on the road.

Life was going normal. I was spending a sufficient amount of time for studying and doing things I love. My health wasnā€™t good at this point.

As far as I remember, it was the 3rd of February when I felt this pain again. The single exception was that it wasnā€™t very sharp, but it stayed for the whole night.

Next day, when I woke up, I felt the stretch in my stomach, and there was a little pain, as well. I assumed that it might be due to the kind of food Iā€™m eating outside, or itā€™s just acidity.

It turns out, even after eating or drinking anything, I started to feel pain in my stomach. Feeling the stretch in the whole abdomen while standing straight was normal. If somehow I ended up coughing, sneezing, laughing, or even yawning, the pain would hit me hard.

I had no idea what I was dealing with, but I wanted to fix it without the help of a doctor. I hate medicines, and I would still do anything to avoid them. Anyway, I decided to change my diet, and as far as I remember, from 9th of January, I stopped eating out. The funny thing is - I just used to eat Biriyani and nothing, and itā€™s never unhealthy to eat Biriyani but to get rid of this pain, I stopped eating it.

Surprisingly, the pain I had started to fade away, but one day when I was working, I felt it again, and this wasnā€™t normal. At this point, I had no idea what to do, and no one in my family knew about it.

Days passed, and I spent 24 days with minor pain in my whole stomach. I was living with it because I didnā€™t want to visit the doctor and take medicines. Meanwhile, I was doing everything to fix this problem, but nothing worked, as it should.

The real problem started to increase at the beginning of February. I was dealing with this issue 24x7. I couldnā€™t eat, sit, and sleep properly. While waking up in the morning, the pain made me feel like shit. I couldnā€™t wake up on time. I couldnā€™t do anything properly. I felt like this thing was eating me from the inside, and it was. The pain was unbearable, but I was dealing with it. I was unaware of the consequences which it was going to put me in.

Two days before I went to the hospital, my mother forced to tell me whatā€™s going with me because she spotted the difference in my behaviour. Due to weakness, I was spending too much of my time in my bed. It was a rare thing for me, as well. Getting angry, not eating, not going out, and taking more than enough time for doing a small task - these things were transforming into an entirely different person.


20th February, 2019

After avoiding doctors for almost 45 days, I finally went to the hospital. I still remember meeting the doctor for the first time, but the big issue was going to the hospital as it was 10kms away from my home. If everything was fine, it would have been easy for me to cover a long distance as Iā€™m used to it, but my condition was so abysmal that even a slight pressure or force could cause extreme pain in my stomach.

To reach to the hospital, I had to switch autorickshaw three times. Again, this isnā€™t a problem, as the issue was the condition of the roads. Every damaged road was the source of pain. I had a rough time that day.

Nevertheless, after reaching the hospital, I met the doctor and told him everything. He told me that he needed to see the Ultrasound reports to understand the issue, and gave me medicines which I had to take for the next 5-days.


27th February, 2019

On the 27th of February, I got my ultrasound reports and decided to visit the doctor on 28th.

Here is something to understand -

I was visiting a Government hospital because a lot of senior and extremely experienced doctors sit there, but when you go to the room, there are more doctors sit along with the head doctor. These doctors are young and less experienced. In other words, we can say that they are ā€œpractisingā€. To me, this is like a nightmare because I face a hard time believing the legitness of a doctor. I respect these people, but I donā€™t trust them.


28th February, 2019

It was a hectic day, and the pain was still there. Even after taking medicines for five days, nothing changed. Coming to the hospital was a big issue because I was having a hard time dealing with my pain.

After I came to the hospital, I realised that the doctor who examined me earlier wasnā€™t in the room. There were four doctors, and they all looked nothing like the one whom Iā€™ve seen before.

I found out that various doctors examins patients on different days, but you can find them on the same day of the week.

It took some time, but I finally told everything that was happening with me. The doctor didnā€™t interrupt, so it was a huge relief. Anyway, after hearing everything and checking my Ultrasound reports, he doubted that I might have Tuberculosis, but he wasnā€™t sure about it. I was asked if anyone in my family had TB before. The answer was - NO. Not a single person in my family has suffered due to any form of Tuberculosis.

The odd thing was that the doctor kept asking if I know anyone who has suffered from this disease, and I kept on saying ā€œNoā€.

After the usual inquiry, I was asked to bring the x-ray reports of my chest. Surprisingly, everything was fine. It means, whatever was causing the problems to me, it had nothing to do with the lungs.

Later, the doctor who was examining me asked the head doctor about my issue, and he immediately told me to go for the Liver Function Test (LFT) and Ascitic Fluid Test (AFT). As it was getting late, I couldnā€™t collect the reports of my tests so that I can show them to the doctor. The pain was already killing me, so I decided to go back home.

Funny thing ~ There were also some tests done to check if Iā€™ve cancer. Haha!


1st March, 2019

Waking up dealing with the pain became a habit, and the unfortunate thing was that I couldnā€™t do anything to stop it. I had to deal with it as there were no other options except to wait for the doctors to tell me what the hell is wrong with my body.

Anyway, I went to the hospital to collect the reports and came home as soon as I could. I wish visiting the hospital and coming back home was an easy thing to do. The broken roads were giving me a hard time. My stomach wasnā€™t in the position to deal with even a slight force. Each bump on the road made go ā€œOuch!ā€.


2nd March, 2019

I went to the same hospital again. This time, I met another doctor. I knew this would happen, but the disappointing this was that there were no senior doctors.

To be frank, I donā€™t trust these junior guys with the stethoscope. The condition can be worse if you meet them in Government hospital. Hereā€™s how you can understand the kind of doctor they are, and the amount of knowledge they hold.

Felt like, the more arrogant doctors I met, the less experienced they were.

The person who was about to examine me was arrogant as fuck. I saw him talking absolute horseshit with the patients. He must be around 25, but full of shit. Fast-forward, my turn came. I started to tell him my problem, and in the middle - I asked him a question, and the fucker immediately lost his mind. He told me to shut up and not to ask any question because ā€œI donā€™t know anything.ā€

The whole incident pissed me off, so I went loud on him and asked him to behave with decency, otherwise, if he has the right to show is arrogance on people older than him, I can do the same, and it wonā€™t be good for his ego. The whole room was quiet for a moment, and everyone was looking at both of us. If Iā€™ve had enough strength that day, then, believe me, Iā€™d have undoubtedly punched him on his face.

Later, when the whole situation was under control, he checked my reports and asked a few questions about my issue. I could see the face that had ā€œlack of experienceā€ written all over it. The doctor had no idea how serious my problem was, and he didnā€™t understand anything, so he told me to bring the reports of two more tests (HBsAg and HCV) that had nothing to do with my problem. He was unquestionably out of his freaking mind, I swear.

Every time I visited the hospital, I used to come with my Nana Ji. During the whole time, he was a huge support. Without him, I think things might have turned worse.

On a lighter note, every time I mention ā€œweā€, it means Iā€™m talking about my Nana Ji and me.

Anyway, we decided to not to go for these tests because the whole incident only made us less confident about the doctorā€™s words. It was a safe bet, so we left the place.


4th March, 2019

On the 2nd of March, it was confirmed that weā€™d be going to visit another doctor because I couldnā€™t afford to lose more time dealing with the wrong ones. I had no interest or intention dying from sickness.

This day, at around 4ā€™o clock, I left my home and went to the clinic so that my name could come early in the list as the doctor checks 70 patients in a single day. Fortunately, one of my relatives (one of the few humble people I know, personally) was already present there, so my name got written first on the list.At around 7ā€™o clock, The compounder told me to come to the clinic at 11 AM.

Anyway, I described everything to the doctor, every single thing. I had numerous test reports with me, so, I showed them to him. After listening to everything, and examining all the test reports, he had the crystal clear idea of whatā€™s happening with me. To make things pellucid and sure, he asked me to bring the CT scan of my abdomen and Ascitic Fluid Test reports. I had the AFT reports, but the doctor said that it isnā€™t sufficiently reliable. I had no reason to doubt his words as I knew where I had been in the last few weeks and what kind of doctors I met.

The final news - 70% chances of Tuberculosis in some part of the abdomen, probably the intestines. My lungs were fine though. Quite surprising hehe!


Update ~ 11th March, 2019

I went to a Pathology for the CT scan. What a horrible experience. I mean everything was okay when I was inside the machine which was doing its job, but in the middle of the session, the person who was operating everything injected shit-ton of some cold fluid through a big injection. I had to close my fist extremely hard so that the vein could be visible on the upside. Anyway, for the next 3-4 hours, my hand was in pain, and the body was cold.

Iā€™ll get the reports tomorrow. Letā€™s see what happens. Although Iā€™m aware of everything thatā€™s going to be in it, still, Iā€™m a little afraid. Moreover, the AFT is still left, and I havenā€™t found any decent place which can help me take out the fluid from my abdomen.


Update ~ 12th March, 2019

I spent another day dealing with extreme discomfort. The process for Ascitic Fluid Test was notably disturbing. Last time when the doctor took out the fluid, he used a different method which wasnā€™t painful, at all. This time, the abdomen fluid needed to be taken out with the help of ultrasound and the injection which had big-ass needles.

When the doctor inserted the syringe in my stomach, I could feel the needles breaking my muscles apart. I wasnā€™t allowed to move, even a bit. The worst thing is - it took him multiple attempts to take out the required amount of fluid, which means the syringe was inserted multiples times in my stomach.

Anyway, I got the CT Scan reports today. It says Iā€™ve Peritoneal Tuberculosis, and there is the formation of cocoons in the pelvic region. Just another terrible day. Iā€™m not sure what else to say, itā€™s almost 11 pm, and things arenā€™t alright.


Update ~ 13th March, 2019

I went to the hospital to show the reports. After checking everything, the doctor said that the tuberculosis is in my abdomen. He had already said that before, he just wanted to be sure about it.

I have been advised to take 1.5 tablets each day, for the next 12 months. Moreover, Iā€™ll need to take the injections for the next 30 days. Bad days for my ass are ahead.


Update ~ 29th March, 2019

Itā€™s been 17 days. There is no relief in pain even though Iā€™m regularly taking my medicines and injection. Iā€™ve to take pain-killers to feel better.

Anyway, I got a call from Nana Ji, and he said that we are going to visit the District Hospital tomorrow. Also, I was at one of my friendā€™s home, and during a conversation, his father asked me about my health. I told him everything. He made a few calls to some people for further help and advised me to visit the District Hospital. Letā€™s see whatā€™s there for tomorrow.

Update ~ 30th March, 2019

Iā€™m ditching the old medicines. I was afraid to do so, but Iā€™m going for the new ones. The doctor says that new medication will surely help me. Also, Iā€™ll take three tablets, daily, for the next six months. The courseā€™s period is still undecided, but six months are minimum.

Anyway, thanks to the injections, Iā€™m not even able to sit comfortably. My health is on itā€™s lowest point, Iā€™ve lost around 15 kgs. I hope things get better.

Update ~ 28st September, 2019

21st September. I got my ultrasound reports.

Thickened bowel loops seen in with small mesenteric lymph nodes. No definite ascetics is seen.

From the reports, I was able to guess that my disease hasnā€™t disappeared yet, even after six months. The good thing - no Ascetic fluid was seen in the abdomen, although the problem in lymph nodes usually gives us the sign that the body is still fighting with some bacteria or virus, in my case, itā€™s Tuberculosis.

Another thing I realised is that Iā€™m going to be under medications for a few more months, probably two to three. I still had to speak to the doctor. On 23rd, I went to the hospital with my reports.

After checking my reports, the doctor said that Iā€™m going to be under medications for the next three months. I wasnā€™t shocked.

While Iā€™m writing this, I feel frustrated. Not sad, but disappointed. Ninety more days. 270 more tablets. A couple of more ultrasounds. Iā€™ve to wait till 3rd January. There is nothing I can pretend to do, except for waiting and swallowing the goddamn pills.


It isnā€™t the end. Iā€™ll update the blog if things get better or worse. For now, the only thing I can say is that I have never gone through such pain. I hope I get better very soon!



Update ~ 2nd January, 2020

I left my home around 10 am and went to the Pathology Center for my ultrasound test. This one was very critical as it would decide if my stomach is free from Tuberculosis or not.

The pain in my upper part of the abdomen is still there. Any form of pressure (while sneezing or coughing) creates a sharp pain. It shows that the disease is not gone yet. After taking medicines for nine months, Iā€™m still not recovered. Itā€™s disappointing.

Anyway, with distressing feelings, I went to the room and got my tests done. To my surprise, the person who was doing the ultrasound asked me to go to the next room where they do the CT scan. I got results after a couple of hours and came back home. Under the impression section, this is what was written -

Enlarged lymphnodes (2.2 x 1.5 cm) are seen in the periportal and periportal region. Clinical correlation is necessary.

It means that the Tuberculosis isnā€™t completely cured yet. Enlarged lymphnodes usually indicate that the body is fighting with bacteria.

What next?

Update ~ 3rd of January, 2020

Terrible day. The doctor was a moron. He refused to discuss the reports. Iā€™m 100% sure that he didnā€™t look at the test reports for more than two seconds, and even though he did, he was unable to find out whether the disease is still there or not.

He said,

Youā€™re taking medicines for the last nine months. Youā€™re fine now. Your disease is cured. Just because thereā€™s a pain in your stomach, doesnā€™t mean its Tuberculosis.

I was sure heā€™s wrong. I went to see another doctor in the same hospital, and he advised me to take medicines for three more months.

After the heated conversation with the doctor who refused to agree that my disease hasnā€™t gone yet, I asked him to provide me with the medicines for the three more months.

Unpleasant experience. Iā€™ve read hundreds of articles by now, and Iā€™m trying to understand whatā€™s taking so long. People get rid of this silly disease within six months. The maximum is nine.

I always feel like Iā€™m unlucky when it comes to getting proper treatment, or maybe Iā€™ve become so weak that my body takes more than enough time to fix itself. Medicines work slowly on me.

My pain hasnā€™t gone yet, and thereā€™s nothing I can pretend to do rather than wait.

Iā€™ll be under medications till the 24th of March. Letā€™s see what happens. Iā€™m not expecting any good or bad news. Iā€™m just waiting for the day when I get rid of this disease.

Update ~ 11th of April, 2020

After continuously taking pills for 370 days, I stopped taking medicines on the 28th of March. I always thought itā€™d be a happy moment and Iā€™ll feel different about it, but everything was normal.

On the other hand, I missed taking meds for a couple of days after lunch.

What about the pain in my stomach? Well, it hasnā€™t completely gone yet, but due to the complete lockdown and unavailability of the vehicle because of COVID-19 Outbreak, I wasnā€™t able to go for the Ultrasound.

I think Iā€™m fine, canā€™t say though. Iā€™m not sure, but I feel like Iā€™m fine. Iā€™m hoping this pain will disappear someday, hopefully. I donā€™t want to die because of this goddamn Tuberculosis. Thatā€™d be an unfortunate sleep.

There are uncertainties, so I canā€™t say much. Although I never skipped a single day without taking medicine and completed the whole course, I think my disease is gone now. I hope it has.

The reason for pain might be something else. I donā€™t want to google anything, so Iā€™ll skip this part.


~


Iā€™m happy to say that the journey of this blog ends today. There will be no further updates, and Iā€™m genuinely pleased to write it.